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Just Playing with Myself

by Evan Watkins

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MoreLikeUserLAME Impressive musically and comedically! Favorite track: Don't Eat the Bat.
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1.
Whiskey Road 04:19
Now I've been known to take a little swig, maybe a little more When I go out I go big, I'll drink you to the floor Get my ride and I hit the town It hits me back with a Gin and Crown When the last call lights I fill my load And I still take one for the road I designate myself to drive The roads are clear it ain't that bad I'm slamming mints and chewing gum It's just a little buzz I'm riding, almost dying, I'm driving down that Whiskey Road You know I'm speeding, best believe it, I'm flying high down that Whiskey Road Burning rubber doing fifty five down a residential street Hard to find the breaks with a whiskey bottle rolling at your feet Got a road soda in my left hand a fresh smoke in my right So I work that steering wheel with my knees all night You know I should know better yeah No time to call a taxi cab Just close one eye and start her up It's a short drive home Oh man I think I'm gonna be sick Could you give me a ride maybe? You know what I'm fine just give me my keys Time to put the hammer down I love to hear my engine roar I mount the curb I hear a bump I hope it's not a kid I'm riding, almost dying, I'm driving down that Whiskey Road You know I'm speeding, best believe it, I'm flying high down that Whiskey Road
2.
Don't eat the bat Now I love bat soup like a growing boy should It tastes like pork and the textures good But if you woulda told me that I could fucking die From a little bat snack I wouldn’t even try Now I can’t do nothing there ain’t shit for me to do No theater shows or sports bro’s restaurants too If I see another person with some bat soup in their bowl If they’re not a fucking vampire I’ll kick them in the skull Don't eat the bat You can eat a cat Or a mother fucking rat Don’t eat the bat
3.
Play it Loud 04:32
Oh I'm in trouble yet again The band goes on just after ten And the sound man kills my buzz Turns those amps so low so we don't alert the fuzz I got full stack power For even smaller crowds There ain't no turning down If you're gonna play it all then you got to play it loud The bar is empty but I don't care It's a Tuesday, oh I'm aware The stage is tiny we play for free But I am twice divorced this is the best part of my week I'm so lonely Music's my only friend There ain't no turning down If you're gonna play it all then you got to play it loud
4.
5.
Take me into your dark embrace Your eyes your mouth your hair and face I wanna know it better, better than before Cause I would walk through your nightmares And still be here with you I would walk through your nightmares And still be here with you In every corner of your mind Greet every monster I can find I don't want to run I don't want to hide I spend the night in your nightmares And you got me feeling fine If I survive, if I survive, if I survive You could kill me dead like a story in your head And I'd be quite alright And I would bleed for you there's nothing I can do On the end of your knife Shadows play on the wall A never ever ending fall I'll take em all take em all Won't you invite me in so that I can begin To feed on your soul There's no need to be afraid Behind your eyes the movie plays A tale of darkness projected in the light I'm inside your darkest dreams and everything's alright I'm alive, I'm alive, I'm alive You could kill me dead like a story in your head And I'd be quite alright And I would bleed for you there's nothing I can do On the end of your knife Shadows play on the wall A never ever ending fall I'll take em all take em all Won't you invite me in so that I can begin To feed on your soul Take me into your dark embrace Your eyes your mouth your hair and face I wanna know it better, better than before Cause I would walk through your nightmares And still be here with you I'll survive, I'll survive, I'll survive
6.
I was born a poor boy lower class living hand to mouth I break my back for a company I never been outta the south A rich man came and he told me that he could fix it all He got my vote now I'm the goat my brother took the fall Tell my lies I watch them die tonight We sold our soul for tax loopholes alright Too bad So sad Looks like we killed the USA Feels about right to escape tonight if only there was somewhere to go The old melting pot it ain't so hot so I'm driving down to Mexico The borders shut the cops are out it looks like we're sneaking in Through the wall I take the fall my nightmare begins It's just not fair, can't live nowhere yeah Red White and Blue the silent coup yeah Too Bad So sad Looks like we killed the USA
7.
There's a fly buzzing around my head I just can't keep him down And I"m sitting outside a cafe Cause it's too damn hot in this town I look over yonder and the waitress is rehearsing her lines I ain't gonna judge her cause I'm sitting here putting down rhymes A lukewarm coffee A dying pen Scowling waitress Comedian Oh we're all in this together but I never felt so alone in my life The old couple with young clothes take the mic at the karaoke bar Singing the same old duet moving like they're real big stars Applause don't last forever and the last call is always at two In the silent after hours they think about the things they never got to do I got friends We all had dreams But time passes quickly or so it seems Well you live to fight another day and maybe it works out this time A delusion solution A faraway dream To think that I could get the world to fall in love with me So I guess I'll have to settle for a dog and a baby and wife
8.
King Baby 04:08
I can feel the hurricane blowing on the wind It’s a category 5 won’t survive if you staying in Governor man says to pack your bags and run But the people down in New Orleans are dead set on having fun You can’t move me, I got no place to go The quarter has the best view of the show Nothing to live for, nothing to fear Already drowning in a bottle of beer King King King King King King Baby Well the storm ripped the doors off the bar like a house of cards Window glass shreds your friend give him my regards People in the streets get swallowed up by the sky King baby takes his last drink knowing he's gonna die Staying right here, the bar is my church I ain’t changing just cause I have submerged Mama used to say I drank like a fish Looks as though she’ll get her wish King King King King King King Baby
9.
Delaware 07:28
I'm stuck in Delaware Living in Wilmington You know no-one cares This place ain't very fun I live in the biggest city in the whole damn state But still it's pretty shitty nothing to fascinate But you know that the rumors are true If you need to buy some pants or some shoes You can get them here for really cheap Get more if your pockets are deep Delaware Ain't no taxes there Delaware is the second smallest state with a land area of 1,948 square miles I could tell you it's boring if you lived here you would agree Most people just pass through cause that shopping is tax free But I can't afford to buy nothing for I'm just a janitor guy Corporation that owns me they couldn't care if I live or I die Every corporation has a headquarters here The state has corporate laws that let them rule without fear Once I discovered something that they tried to hide A plan to dominate the world with mass genocide They must be stopped I'm stuck in Delaware Imprisoned in a padded cell You know no one cares They turned the planet into hell I told the FBI about their evil plan But they've all been bought out and sold by the businessman So when you're sitting staring at your screen And you get the urge to buy some jeans The compulsion is programmed in They buried it under your skin Delaware There ain't no taxes there

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This album was written, performed, recorded and mixed entirely by Evan Watkins, so if you hate it you can take it up with him.

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released January 1, 2021

Cover photo by M. Rosati

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Evan Watkins Los Angeles, California

Rock and roll may be dead, but you can't keep a good zombie down.

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